Friday, 6/1/2001
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, all who are reading (it just feels so much like flailing in the wind to greet those who aren�t reading) ~
First the best news: Pharoah�s been found and is home! Guessing that those of you not in the Puget Sound area have no idea what I�m talking about, here�s a brief review: Pharoah is the furrier half of a K-9 corps team. (Not having seen the human half of the team, I freely acknowledge that I�ve just made an assumption.) He was doing his job, chasing some criminals into the woods, when he disappeared. A major search was launched and produced no sightings. Finally it was officially called off. A week passed with no sign of Pharoah. Then the word came. A volunteer firefighter, who had refused to give up the search, found Pharoah about 30 feet from where he was last seen. It seems that when they�re separated, police dogs are trained to return to the last place they saw their human partner, and Pharoah did what he�d been taught. Appropriate to his status as a returning hero, Pharoah was given a police escort (more like a motorcade) to the vet. He had a gash in his leg and had lost a lot of weight, but was otherwise in good health. He�ll be back on the job in about 2 weeks, it was reported.
I�ve definitely shifted into �preparing to move to Santa Fe� mode. I�m sorting and clearing out everything I own (my goal is to get it all down to no more than 2 car loads), and today I was looking at a map to find possible travel routes to Santa Fe. There�s still lots to do, and I�m working on it. One of the voices in my head just said, �Finally.� It�s only been about 4 years.
Of course, by June 15 I still need to find somewhere to live here for 2 � months until I leave for Santa Fe. Isn�t living on the edge fun?
So, anyway, last Thursday was Jeff Alexander�s birthday. (For the edification of you who are very new to my letters, he�s the facilitator/teacher of Leap of Faith.) A bunch of us, mostly Leap staff, joined him for his birthday dinner at a Mexican restaurant, and then some of us went on to a movie together.
What makes that worthy of notice? Well, it was a leap for me, the loss of my Warrior Spirit socializing virginity, so to speak. Yes, it�s true. In the nearly 2 years that I�ve been involved with Warrior Spirit, despite many opportunities, I�ve never done anything social with them before this. Can you say �introvert�? Can you say �social anxiety�? Not your image of me? It isn�t most people�s image of me. Yet, I�m a recovering shy person. I may not look like one to other people, but I feel like one inside sometimes.
And speaking of that, my real leap of faith is coming up July 7. That�s the day the Warrior Spirit folks are playing The Game again. Last time I didn�t leap into the opportunity. Fortunately (in spiritual terms, at least), they�re doing it again before I leave. �The Game?� you say. Yes, The Game. Go ahead � ask. �What�s The Game?� you ask. Thanks for asking. Very briefly, it�s a fantasy game in which the men and the women �happen� to meet in a place where there�s dancing, pretend not to know each other, and then get together. One of the rules is that everyone dances with several other people before they do with their real partner (if they have one). Sound like fun?
Well, to at least one of my inner voices it sounds scarier than going to a street gang and asking to be jumped in. Want to really scare me? Set me up facing a line of attractive women who might (at least in my imagination) act coldly and/or unkindly toward me, especially in a place where there�s dancing. I nearly stop breathing just thinking about it. Okay, okay, I know the reality isn�t all that awful. I�m thinking about some of the dances I�ve been to with women in attendance who are more conscious than normal women are. But somehow my imagination goes back to junior high school instead of to those. Keep breathing, Michael.
Anyway, I�m going to leap and do it. Interesting. One of my voices says that I�ll do it inappropriately in some way � I�ll wear the wrong clothes or say the wrong thing or won�t know the right protocol. Junior high stuff.
You can�t accuse me of being one of those guys who�s always trying to impress people and who won�t let them see his weaknesses, huh? Well, I suppose you could, but . . . .
So, undigressing and getting back to last Thursday, the movie Jeff wanted to see was �A Knight�s Tale.� I wouldn�t have chosen to go to it on my own, and it turned out that I�m glad I saw it. Briefly, it�s about a peasant assistant (William) to a knight who participates in joust competitions. The knight dies, and William takes on an assumed identity as a knight in order to be able to participate. (Only noblemen were allowed to participate.) Of course, he quickly demonstrates a knack for it and becomes a champion. In the process he and a noblewoman fall in love. Then, of course, William is revealed as the man he really is and is arrested. I won�t tell how it ends.
Themes that particularly impacted me: rising above one�s history and �station in life� to demonstrate one�s magnificent inner essence, �following one�s feet� to reconnect with loved ones we�ve been separated from.
Characters to emulate: William, who let nothing stand in the way of becoming who he could be; his love (don�t recall her name), who cared more about the man than about his status; his father, who gave William his opportunity in life by letting him go away (a lot like natural parents who allow their children to be adopted when they can�t give them what they need); Prince Edward, who honored William�s spirit more than his circumstances of birth.
On my personal scale of 0-5, I rate it 3. (0 = I don�t perceive any redeeming value; 1 = I enjoyed it slightly and/or I found a small positive message; 2 = I enjoyed it some and/or it had some positive messages; 3 = One of the average movies I enjoy with positive messages; 4 = I liked this movie a lot, and it had positive messages; 5 = One of my favorite movies, and it had positive messages.)
I was profoundly affected by a TV drama (on Judging Amy, which I recommend to anyone who doesn�t already watch it) about a young teen who had killed the stepfather who had been raping her and was being tried for murder. I don�t particularly want to say anything more about it now. Maybe later after I�ve processed it some more. Did anyone else see it? What did you think/feel?
Basta.
Let�s keep following Spirit without hesitation.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ABOUT THIS IS MY LIFE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This Is My Life is my letters to my family, friends, and whoever
else may be interested about whatever is meaningful to me in
my life. I don't guarantee anything about content or frequency.
The letters will be whatever they turn out to be. If you want
the best option available for keeping up with what�s happening
with me, though, this is it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
COPIES AND FORWARDING
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You�re welcome to freely redistribute This Is My Life (my
letters) if you think someone might be interested in reading it.
Please don�t use any of it for profit, though.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ARCHIVES OF MY LETTERS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you would like to read the archives of my letters and/or
holiday letters and travel reports I've written since 1977, visit
the This Is My Life Delphi Forum at
http://www.delphi.com/ThisIsMyLife.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
MY COMMUNITY
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another excellent way to know what�s going on with me is to join
the Heart Song Community e-mail list. That�s an e-mail
community that provides opportunity for discussing a variety of
topics and sharing about our personal lives. You can get more
information and join at
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongCommunity.
~~~~~~~~~
MY WORK
~~~~~~~~~
If you�re interested in my work, I invite you to take a look at
the Heart Song Schedule. That provides information about the
e-zines, classes, workshops, retreats, ministry, web sites, and
other programs offered by the various people and projects of
Heart Song Projects. HSP is an affiliation of people and
projects tied together by shared psychospiritual foundations
and purposes � to contribute to healing, growth, expansion, and
spiritual awakening and to serve Spirit in all life. You can see
the most recent schedules at either
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongSchedule/messages
or http://igc.topica.com/lists/hsschedule/read.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Friday, June 01, 2001
Wednesday, May 30, 2001
Tuesday, 5/29/2001
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, lifers (you do realize that we�re all in this � whatever it may be � for life, don�t you?) ~
There�s one thing you can say about my relationship with my computer: I�m creative about the kinds of problems I have. I have problems that I�ve never heard of anyone else having. This time I ran out of space on my hard drive and couldn�t download anything. So, do you know anyone else who�s ever had that happen? As first aid, I deleted some of the software I have that I don�t use. Then I began deleting some files I�ve saved, unsubscribing from lists I don�t really want to be on, changing as many subscriptions as I could that were coming in HTML to plain text, doing a long overdue thorough scan and defrag (my hard drive was over 10% fragmented, and it took all day to complete), and searching my hard drive for anything else I could get rid of. I discovered that I have all kinds of things in my temp files that are taking up lots of space. Now I just need to find out if I can safely delete it all. Oh, and I also discovered that I have 2 different folders for temporary internet files that seem to have many of the same things in them. I don�t know if that�s normal or not, but it doesn�t seem like it should be. Unfortunately, I don�t know which one to get rid of.
Okay, here�s a question that surely one of you will know the answer to: What�s a cache, and how do I find it? I�ve read quite a few times that I should empty my caches regularly. Well, since I don�t know what they are, I�ve never done it. That may be part of the problem. Are the temp files a cache?
Anyway, the consequence of all of this is that during the past week and a half I�ve had very little time on my computer for doing anything else. That means I haven�t been participating much on my lists or getting my e-mailings out. And I still have more of the clean-up work to do. I refuse to feel guilty about it � at least not much.
Hey, how about those Mariners? And how about that Ichiro? That�s all I�m going to say about it for now. But if they keep going as they are, . . . I�ve been a Mariners fan through thick and thin, ever since they were created as an expansion team, through miserable seasons, through seasons filled with hope that never quite panned out, through the loss of 3 future Hall of Famers. It�s about time we had a team with the best record in major league baseball. (Notice how I�ve identified myself with the team.) And isn�t it wonderful how the guy who�s become an instant phenom really wants to be in Seattle on this team and is more concerned with how much he�s contributing than about his statistics or how much he�s being paid. This is a team with chemistry and character, with a whole squad of guys willing to do what�s needed instead of grandstanding and complaining. It�s the kind of team I�m excited to see win. I guess I was wrong about not saying more.
I�m continuing to be fascinated by what all �happens� into my life. Sunday evening I felt drawn to a made-for-TV movie called �Scattering [something � Hiram? Father?)� with Olympia Dukakis and Andy Griffith. I had no idea why I felt the draw except that it sounded like a family/relationships movie, and you probably already know that that kind of movie often appeals to me. Did you happen to see it? It turned out to be much more than I expected. (Serendipity seems to be one of the themes of my life lately.) In short, it was an allegory paralleling the process of Leap of Faith (http://www.warriorspirit.org).
Briefly, it was about Dotty, who lived a life limited to such a degree by panic attacks that she never even left her home (in New Mexico, by the way � another call). Her husband Hiram died, but didn�t leave. As is often the case with survivors, Dotty continued having conversations with him regularly. Between Hiram and 3 Native American spirits who kept appearing to her, she began receiving guidance that would reveal the Berserker (a person who embodies courage and demonstrates it by leading others into a fear-filled situation) that hid within her.
Hiram�s spirit told her that, despite her perceived limitations, Dotty�s mission was to take his ashes to Cathedral Rock (which was apparently quite a few miles from home) and scatter them there. And so, because of her love for Hiram, she leapt. At first her leap took the form of putting one foot in front of the other, walking out into the desert, having to count her steps to distract her mind from the fear. But, with each step, both literal and symbolic, her leaps became larger and larger.
The couple�s 2 daughters also both had significant issues (as might be imagined, having grown up with a mother who was too involved in her dysfunction to really be there for them). Among their issues was being estranged from and judgmental of each other. Worried and feeling responsible, however, they set out together to find their mother � imagining that they were going to rescue her, not realizing that they were going to be saved themselves. Eventually, they found her at the bottom of Cathedral Rock. There, together, led by Dotty�s vision of the 3 Native American spirits, they climbed to the top of the mountain to fulfill their mission � to scatter Hiram�s ashes. In the process, each of them took leaps and each of them was healed, separately and in relation to each other. And each of them showed herself to be a hero. They leapt, and in the leaping, they were transformed. After returning home, in Dotty�s last conversation with Hiram, she said to him, �You sent me out to sink or swim.� His reply, �No, you did it.�
They all did it . . . and in the process, they showed us that heroes aren�t bigger than life people; they�re just natural people like all of us who, despite what they think about their own abilities, choose to follow Spirit (or spirits), motivated by love, and take the necessary action that presents itself.
Synchronicity: Well, as you must realize by now, anything about New Mexico or Santa Fe that comes into my awareness unexpectedly is synchronistic in my life. But, beyond that, when the movie started, I was eating dinner. What had I fixed for myself? Santa Fe rice.
More synchronicity: Subaru Outback was one of the program sponsors. Clearly Outbacks have taken on a mythical quality for me just like Santa Fe and NM have.
And yet, despite all the synchronicity and signs, I still feel anxious about my move to Santa Fe. What more will it take for me to surrender in faith? Or, is the more relevant issue that I continue to take my steps, even though I feel anxious? Is that really what faith is? Yes, I know the answer.
And here, just when I was beginning to wonder if I�d ever find it: http://www.shibumi.org/eoti.htm
That�s enough for this one. It�s already pretty long. I still have some things to tell you about last Thursday, but they�ll wait until my next letter.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ABOUT THIS IS MY LIFE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This Is My Life is my letters to my family, friends, and whoever
else may be interested about whatever is meaningful to me in
my life. I don't guarantee anything about content or frequency.
The letters will be whatever they turn out to be. If you want
the best option available for keeping up with what�s happening
with me, though, this is it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
COPIES AND FORWARDING
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You�re welcome to freely redistribute This Is My Life (my
letters) if you think someone might be interested in reading it.
Please don�t use any of it for profit, though.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ARCHIVES OF MY LETTERS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you would like to read the archives of my letters and/or
holiday letters and travel reports I've written since 1977, visit
the This Is My Life Delphi Forum at
http://www.delphi.com/ThisIsMyLife.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
MY COMMUNITY
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another excellent way to know what�s going on with me is to join
the Heart Song Community e-mail list. That�s an e-mail
community that provides opportunity for discussing a variety of
topics and sharing about our personal lives. You can get more
information and join at
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongCommunity.
~~~~~~~~~
MY WORK
~~~~~~~~~
If you�re interested in my work, I invite you to take a look at
the Heart Song Schedule. That provides information about the
e-zines, classes, workshops, retreats, ministry, web sites, and
other programs offered by the various people and projects of
Heart Song Projects. HSP is an affiliation of people and
projects tied together by shared psychospiritual foundations
and purposes � to contribute to healing, growth, expansion, and
spiritual awakening and to serve Spirit in all life. You can see
the most recent schedules at either
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongSchedule/messages
or http://igc.topica.com/lists/hsschedule/read.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, lifers (you do realize that we�re all in this � whatever it may be � for life, don�t you?) ~
There�s one thing you can say about my relationship with my computer: I�m creative about the kinds of problems I have. I have problems that I�ve never heard of anyone else having. This time I ran out of space on my hard drive and couldn�t download anything. So, do you know anyone else who�s ever had that happen? As first aid, I deleted some of the software I have that I don�t use. Then I began deleting some files I�ve saved, unsubscribing from lists I don�t really want to be on, changing as many subscriptions as I could that were coming in HTML to plain text, doing a long overdue thorough scan and defrag (my hard drive was over 10% fragmented, and it took all day to complete), and searching my hard drive for anything else I could get rid of. I discovered that I have all kinds of things in my temp files that are taking up lots of space. Now I just need to find out if I can safely delete it all. Oh, and I also discovered that I have 2 different folders for temporary internet files that seem to have many of the same things in them. I don�t know if that�s normal or not, but it doesn�t seem like it should be. Unfortunately, I don�t know which one to get rid of.
Okay, here�s a question that surely one of you will know the answer to: What�s a cache, and how do I find it? I�ve read quite a few times that I should empty my caches regularly. Well, since I don�t know what they are, I�ve never done it. That may be part of the problem. Are the temp files a cache?
Anyway, the consequence of all of this is that during the past week and a half I�ve had very little time on my computer for doing anything else. That means I haven�t been participating much on my lists or getting my e-mailings out. And I still have more of the clean-up work to do. I refuse to feel guilty about it � at least not much.
Hey, how about those Mariners? And how about that Ichiro? That�s all I�m going to say about it for now. But if they keep going as they are, . . . I�ve been a Mariners fan through thick and thin, ever since they were created as an expansion team, through miserable seasons, through seasons filled with hope that never quite panned out, through the loss of 3 future Hall of Famers. It�s about time we had a team with the best record in major league baseball. (Notice how I�ve identified myself with the team.) And isn�t it wonderful how the guy who�s become an instant phenom really wants to be in Seattle on this team and is more concerned with how much he�s contributing than about his statistics or how much he�s being paid. This is a team with chemistry and character, with a whole squad of guys willing to do what�s needed instead of grandstanding and complaining. It�s the kind of team I�m excited to see win. I guess I was wrong about not saying more.
I�m continuing to be fascinated by what all �happens� into my life. Sunday evening I felt drawn to a made-for-TV movie called �Scattering [something � Hiram? Father?)� with Olympia Dukakis and Andy Griffith. I had no idea why I felt the draw except that it sounded like a family/relationships movie, and you probably already know that that kind of movie often appeals to me. Did you happen to see it? It turned out to be much more than I expected. (Serendipity seems to be one of the themes of my life lately.) In short, it was an allegory paralleling the process of Leap of Faith (http://www.warriorspirit.org).
Briefly, it was about Dotty, who lived a life limited to such a degree by panic attacks that she never even left her home (in New Mexico, by the way � another call). Her husband Hiram died, but didn�t leave. As is often the case with survivors, Dotty continued having conversations with him regularly. Between Hiram and 3 Native American spirits who kept appearing to her, she began receiving guidance that would reveal the Berserker (a person who embodies courage and demonstrates it by leading others into a fear-filled situation) that hid within her.
Hiram�s spirit told her that, despite her perceived limitations, Dotty�s mission was to take his ashes to Cathedral Rock (which was apparently quite a few miles from home) and scatter them there. And so, because of her love for Hiram, she leapt. At first her leap took the form of putting one foot in front of the other, walking out into the desert, having to count her steps to distract her mind from the fear. But, with each step, both literal and symbolic, her leaps became larger and larger.
The couple�s 2 daughters also both had significant issues (as might be imagined, having grown up with a mother who was too involved in her dysfunction to really be there for them). Among their issues was being estranged from and judgmental of each other. Worried and feeling responsible, however, they set out together to find their mother � imagining that they were going to rescue her, not realizing that they were going to be saved themselves. Eventually, they found her at the bottom of Cathedral Rock. There, together, led by Dotty�s vision of the 3 Native American spirits, they climbed to the top of the mountain to fulfill their mission � to scatter Hiram�s ashes. In the process, each of them took leaps and each of them was healed, separately and in relation to each other. And each of them showed herself to be a hero. They leapt, and in the leaping, they were transformed. After returning home, in Dotty�s last conversation with Hiram, she said to him, �You sent me out to sink or swim.� His reply, �No, you did it.�
They all did it . . . and in the process, they showed us that heroes aren�t bigger than life people; they�re just natural people like all of us who, despite what they think about their own abilities, choose to follow Spirit (or spirits), motivated by love, and take the necessary action that presents itself.
Synchronicity: Well, as you must realize by now, anything about New Mexico or Santa Fe that comes into my awareness unexpectedly is synchronistic in my life. But, beyond that, when the movie started, I was eating dinner. What had I fixed for myself? Santa Fe rice.
More synchronicity: Subaru Outback was one of the program sponsors. Clearly Outbacks have taken on a mythical quality for me just like Santa Fe and NM have.
And yet, despite all the synchronicity and signs, I still feel anxious about my move to Santa Fe. What more will it take for me to surrender in faith? Or, is the more relevant issue that I continue to take my steps, even though I feel anxious? Is that really what faith is? Yes, I know the answer.
And here, just when I was beginning to wonder if I�d ever find it: http://www.shibumi.org/eoti.htm
That�s enough for this one. It�s already pretty long. I still have some things to tell you about last Thursday, but they�ll wait until my next letter.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ABOUT THIS IS MY LIFE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This Is My Life is my letters to my family, friends, and whoever
else may be interested about whatever is meaningful to me in
my life. I don't guarantee anything about content or frequency.
The letters will be whatever they turn out to be. If you want
the best option available for keeping up with what�s happening
with me, though, this is it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
COPIES AND FORWARDING
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You�re welcome to freely redistribute This Is My Life (my
letters) if you think someone might be interested in reading it.
Please don�t use any of it for profit, though.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ARCHIVES OF MY LETTERS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you would like to read the archives of my letters and/or
holiday letters and travel reports I've written since 1977, visit
the This Is My Life Delphi Forum at
http://www.delphi.com/ThisIsMyLife.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
MY COMMUNITY
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another excellent way to know what�s going on with me is to join
the Heart Song Community e-mail list. That�s an e-mail
community that provides opportunity for discussing a variety of
topics and sharing about our personal lives. You can get more
information and join at
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongCommunity.
~~~~~~~~~
MY WORK
~~~~~~~~~
If you�re interested in my work, I invite you to take a look at
the Heart Song Schedule. That provides information about the
e-zines, classes, workshops, retreats, ministry, web sites, and
other programs offered by the various people and projects of
Heart Song Projects. HSP is an affiliation of people and
projects tied together by shared psychospiritual foundations
and purposes � to contribute to healing, growth, expansion, and
spiritual awakening and to serve Spirit in all life. You can see
the most recent schedules at either
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongSchedule/messages
or http://igc.topica.com/lists/hsschedule/read.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Originally published Monday, 5/28/2001
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, believers (and everyone is, because everyone believes in something) ~
A few days ago I found a quiz on the Beliefnet web site (http://www.beliefnet.com) that compares our own beliefs to those of 27 different religious traditions and tells us which ones we�re most similar to. Here�s what they say on the web site:
�The top score on the list below represents the faith that Belief-O-Matic, in its less than infinite wisdom, thinks most closely matches your beliefs. However, even a score of 100% does not mean that your views are all shared by this faith, or vice versa. The higher a faith appears on this list, the more closely it aligns with your thinking.�
I was surprised by my results. Here are my rankings:
1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Neo-Pagan (92%)
3. Liberal Quaker (86%)
4. New Age (86%)
5. Mainline to Liberal Christian/Protestant (79%)
6. Theravada Buddhism (76%)
7. Hinduism (75%)
8. Mahayana Buddhism (73%)
9. Sikhism (70%)
10. New Thought (70%)
11. Reform Judaism (68%)
12. Scientology (62%)
13. Jainism (55%)
14. Taoism (52%)
15. Baha�i (52%)
16. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (50%)
17. Secular Humanism (49%)
18. Orthodox Quaker (39%)
19. Orthodox Judaism (33%)
20. Mormon (Latter-day Saints) (33%)
21. Eastern Orthodox (25%)
22. Roman Catholic (25%)
23. Islam (23%)
24. Jehovah�s Witness (22%)
25. Seventh Day Adventist (20%)
26. Atheism and Agnosticism (19%)
27. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (15%)
So, what do you think of that? Fascinating, huh? I�m surprised that New Thought is so low, and I�m very surprised that I, a former U-U minister who dropped out because I felt like I didn�t really fit as a U-U, ended up being most similar to Unitarian-Universalism. Maybe I need to pay more attention to what�s going on in U-U groups again.
And what�s Hindu doing in there at #7? I�ve never had much interest in Hinduism. Sikhism at #9? I don�t even know much about it except that they wear turbans. Perhaps I should investigate. Why isn�t Baha�i higher? I considered becoming one when I was in college. (By the way, I can research the answers to these questions on the web site, which is devoted to exploring all forms of belief. They give a link for each of the 27 traditions for us to investigate how we compare to them.)
On the whole, though, I�d say that the traditions I would have picked out as the ones I�ve been most influenced by are the ones in the top half of the list.
Are you interested in seeing which religious traditions most agree with what you believe? You can take Beliefnet's Belief-O-Matic quiz at http://www.beliefnet.com/features/beliefomatic. I�d be interested in seeing your results.
Now I�d like to see them adapt it to compare 2 people�s spiritual beliefs to each other � kind of like comparing astrology charts, only with something that matters more to me in finding a romantic partner.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, believers (and everyone is, because everyone believes in something) ~
A few days ago I found a quiz on the Beliefnet web site (http://www.beliefnet.com) that compares our own beliefs to those of 27 different religious traditions and tells us which ones we�re most similar to. Here�s what they say on the web site:
�The top score on the list below represents the faith that Belief-O-Matic, in its less than infinite wisdom, thinks most closely matches your beliefs. However, even a score of 100% does not mean that your views are all shared by this faith, or vice versa. The higher a faith appears on this list, the more closely it aligns with your thinking.�
I was surprised by my results. Here are my rankings:
1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Neo-Pagan (92%)
3. Liberal Quaker (86%)
4. New Age (86%)
5. Mainline to Liberal Christian/Protestant (79%)
6. Theravada Buddhism (76%)
7. Hinduism (75%)
8. Mahayana Buddhism (73%)
9. Sikhism (70%)
10. New Thought (70%)
11. Reform Judaism (68%)
12. Scientology (62%)
13. Jainism (55%)
14. Taoism (52%)
15. Baha�i (52%)
16. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (50%)
17. Secular Humanism (49%)
18. Orthodox Quaker (39%)
19. Orthodox Judaism (33%)
20. Mormon (Latter-day Saints) (33%)
21. Eastern Orthodox (25%)
22. Roman Catholic (25%)
23. Islam (23%)
24. Jehovah�s Witness (22%)
25. Seventh Day Adventist (20%)
26. Atheism and Agnosticism (19%)
27. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (15%)
So, what do you think of that? Fascinating, huh? I�m surprised that New Thought is so low, and I�m very surprised that I, a former U-U minister who dropped out because I felt like I didn�t really fit as a U-U, ended up being most similar to Unitarian-Universalism. Maybe I need to pay more attention to what�s going on in U-U groups again.
And what�s Hindu doing in there at #7? I�ve never had much interest in Hinduism. Sikhism at #9? I don�t even know much about it except that they wear turbans. Perhaps I should investigate. Why isn�t Baha�i higher? I considered becoming one when I was in college. (By the way, I can research the answers to these questions on the web site, which is devoted to exploring all forms of belief. They give a link for each of the 27 traditions for us to investigate how we compare to them.)
On the whole, though, I�d say that the traditions I would have picked out as the ones I�ve been most influenced by are the ones in the top half of the list.
Are you interested in seeing which religious traditions most agree with what you believe? You can take Beliefnet's Belief-O-Matic quiz at http://www.beliefnet.com/features/beliefomatic. I�d be interested in seeing your results.
Now I�d like to see them adapt it to compare 2 people�s spiritual beliefs to each other � kind of like comparing astrology charts, only with something that matters more to me in finding a romantic partner.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Originally published Monday, 5/21/2001
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, folks ~
I�ve been watching �Anne Frank� on TV. This, I say, is one good answer to the people who tell us to turn off our TVs. (And there are many others, too, in my opinion � Oprah, Hallmark Hall of Fame dramas, Touched by an Angel, The West Wing, Mariners games, Sex Wars � okay, I�ve drifted off-purpose here.)
Yesterday I wrote about some characteristics of the women I�m attracted to. And now here�s a perfect example. If Anne Frank had been a little older (or if I�d been a teenage young man), I�d have fallen madly in love with her.
Barbara said that the term I�m looking for is �lives with passion.� Yes, that�s a big part of what I was describing. I find women who live passionately incredibly attractive. Anne Frank did live with passion. Maybe the rest of it (being non-ordinary) is really a different characteristic. This is all very interesting to me. (I wonder if it is to you, too. But I don�t wonder in the sense that I�ll change anything if people aren�t interested. I wonder in the sense of wondering if we�re of a similar consciousness.)
Watching �Anne Frank,� I�ve realized several more key characteristics of the women I find most attractive: being bright (intelligent), being creative, and being perceptive (insightful).
This morning I had a wonderful opportunity to experience what I said about being attracted to women who are offbeat. Actually, it was an opportunity to experience not being attracted to women who are �culturally usual.� (Now there�s a term for you, huh?) There was a short fashion show on Today. I always find fashion show consciousness very unattractive. It isn�t that I don�t find the models physically attractive; it�s that I don�t resonate with the consciousness. The whole �status through creating appearances� consciousness is unappealing to me. I don�t mean liking to look good. I mean wanting to impress people and be superior based on appearances � beauty, clothing, jewelry, make-up, etc. Another great example is people raving over big diamond rings. This reminds me of a woman I was involved with at one time whose goal was to have a large diamond ring. I hope she got what she wants with someone else. If �diamonds are a girl�s best friend,� then I�m not the one for them. In fact, I think I�ve found a good question to ask women I might date: How do you feel about diamond rings? Also: Is fashion important to you? I�m not saying people for whom diamonds and fashion are important are wrong - just that they aren�t for me.
Back to Anne Frank. I think I may have known her during my immediate past life. I don�t know for sure. It�s a sense I have, though. If I did, I probably didn�t know her well, but it isn�t clear enough yet for me to remember. I think I�ll read her diary and see if that triggers any memories in me.
Warrior Spirit (the organization that offers Leap of Faith) has a fund-raising auction once a year in October. I�ve been thinking about what I could offer to help raise money that might be an attractive item for an auction. Then one day it suddenly just occurred to me � I�m going to put together a vacation package for Santa Fe. That way I won�t just contribute to Warrior Spirit, I�ll also encourage someone to come to Santa Fe to visit me. It will include several nights in a B&B, pick-up and drop-off at the airport in Albuquerque, admissions to several major attractions there, guided tours if the people want them, dinners in some of my favorite restaurants, and a variety of other opportunities. Sound good? It does to me.
There�s a business possibility: Tour packages for conscious people. They would focus on the kinds of things that appeal to me � which often aren�t the same things that appeal to normal people. Or I could write a conscious person�s guide to Northern NM. That sounds like a lot of fun. Do you think there would be a market for it? Then I could do one for Sedona.
Synchronicity report: There�s a new food and drug store in the Crossroads (in Bellevue, WA) area that�s having its grand opening. As part of it, they�re having a drawing for a Subaru Outback, which is probably the car I�d most like to have. So, I put an entry into the box. A few minutes later I was driving on the freeway, thinking about how having a new Outback would help with my move to Santa Fe. A car passed me on the left. It had a NM license plate. I knew I was being called again. Then I noticed the car that was following it � a Subaru Outback. Pretty interesting, huh?
All of life is really pretty interesting if we�ll only choose to look for whatever fascinates us.
[And he philosophizes himself off into the sunset . . . .]
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, folks ~
I�ve been watching �Anne Frank� on TV. This, I say, is one good answer to the people who tell us to turn off our TVs. (And there are many others, too, in my opinion � Oprah, Hallmark Hall of Fame dramas, Touched by an Angel, The West Wing, Mariners games, Sex Wars � okay, I�ve drifted off-purpose here.)
Yesterday I wrote about some characteristics of the women I�m attracted to. And now here�s a perfect example. If Anne Frank had been a little older (or if I�d been a teenage young man), I�d have fallen madly in love with her.
Barbara said that the term I�m looking for is �lives with passion.� Yes, that�s a big part of what I was describing. I find women who live passionately incredibly attractive. Anne Frank did live with passion. Maybe the rest of it (being non-ordinary) is really a different characteristic. This is all very interesting to me. (I wonder if it is to you, too. But I don�t wonder in the sense that I�ll change anything if people aren�t interested. I wonder in the sense of wondering if we�re of a similar consciousness.)
Watching �Anne Frank,� I�ve realized several more key characteristics of the women I find most attractive: being bright (intelligent), being creative, and being perceptive (insightful).
This morning I had a wonderful opportunity to experience what I said about being attracted to women who are offbeat. Actually, it was an opportunity to experience not being attracted to women who are �culturally usual.� (Now there�s a term for you, huh?) There was a short fashion show on Today. I always find fashion show consciousness very unattractive. It isn�t that I don�t find the models physically attractive; it�s that I don�t resonate with the consciousness. The whole �status through creating appearances� consciousness is unappealing to me. I don�t mean liking to look good. I mean wanting to impress people and be superior based on appearances � beauty, clothing, jewelry, make-up, etc. Another great example is people raving over big diamond rings. This reminds me of a woman I was involved with at one time whose goal was to have a large diamond ring. I hope she got what she wants with someone else. If �diamonds are a girl�s best friend,� then I�m not the one for them. In fact, I think I�ve found a good question to ask women I might date: How do you feel about diamond rings? Also: Is fashion important to you? I�m not saying people for whom diamonds and fashion are important are wrong - just that they aren�t for me.
Back to Anne Frank. I think I may have known her during my immediate past life. I don�t know for sure. It�s a sense I have, though. If I did, I probably didn�t know her well, but it isn�t clear enough yet for me to remember. I think I�ll read her diary and see if that triggers any memories in me.
Warrior Spirit (the organization that offers Leap of Faith) has a fund-raising auction once a year in October. I�ve been thinking about what I could offer to help raise money that might be an attractive item for an auction. Then one day it suddenly just occurred to me � I�m going to put together a vacation package for Santa Fe. That way I won�t just contribute to Warrior Spirit, I�ll also encourage someone to come to Santa Fe to visit me. It will include several nights in a B&B, pick-up and drop-off at the airport in Albuquerque, admissions to several major attractions there, guided tours if the people want them, dinners in some of my favorite restaurants, and a variety of other opportunities. Sound good? It does to me.
There�s a business possibility: Tour packages for conscious people. They would focus on the kinds of things that appeal to me � which often aren�t the same things that appeal to normal people. Or I could write a conscious person�s guide to Northern NM. That sounds like a lot of fun. Do you think there would be a market for it? Then I could do one for Sedona.
Synchronicity report: There�s a new food and drug store in the Crossroads (in Bellevue, WA) area that�s having its grand opening. As part of it, they�re having a drawing for a Subaru Outback, which is probably the car I�d most like to have. So, I put an entry into the box. A few minutes later I was driving on the freeway, thinking about how having a new Outback would help with my move to Santa Fe. A car passed me on the left. It had a NM license plate. I knew I was being called again. Then I noticed the car that was following it � a Subaru Outback. Pretty interesting, huh?
All of life is really pretty interesting if we�ll only choose to look for whatever fascinates us.
[And he philosophizes himself off into the sunset . . . .]
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Originally published Sunday, 5/20/2001
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi again, y�all ~
There�s been an issue jumping up and down and waving its arms in my awareness lately. I�ve been trying to describe a characteristic that I find exceptionally attractive in women. It isn�t the only characteristic I find attractive, but it is an important one. It has described most (if not all) of the women I�ve been very attracted to in the past 6 or 8 years. It explains why I�ve lost interest in some of the women I�ve been involved with. It partly explains why I haven�t dated much since Valerie. (I no longer date women who I might have dated in the past who aren�t like this.) When I look back on women in my past who I�m still strongly attracted to (and there are more than a few of them), it describes all of them � at least at the time I knew them it described them. And there�s one woman I knew in 1977 (who I really can�t say I was involved with) who was the operational definition of what I mean. (I mean Wendy, for those of you who know about her.) It describes most (if not all) of the women I�ve mentioned in these letters. It describes what makes so many women in Leap of Faith attractive to me. It explains why I don�t think I could ever fall in love with someone I meet via e-mail until I�ve met her in person. It explains why I can fall in love with characters in movies who don�t even really exist in real life.
As I write about this, I�m beginning to see how important this is to me � even more than I thought before. Wow.
I don�t have the (brief) right words to describe it. If anyone can help me, I�d be grateful. It�s so frustrating for me not to be able to easily communicate what I mean to other people.
Here are some words that capture aspects of what I mean: enthusiastic, vibrant, energetic, expressive, positive, eager, adventurous, and youthful in spirit. Elaborating:
The women I�m describing are self-expressive � physically, facially, emotionally, verbally. That�s why actresses, dancers, and artists are all especially attractive to me. As examples, imagine Liv Ullman, Goldie Hawn, Meryl Streep, Meg Ryan, and Kate Hudson (to use examples from a range of ages). I usually fall in love with women who cry with me � or at least in my presence. The more women put their all into Leap of Faith, the more I find them attractive. I love open self-expression.
The women I�m describing usually have an offbeat, non-traditional quality of some sort (that�s also related to the self-expressiveness). For example, I tend to like women who dress unconventionally. I often like women who think outside the cultural boxes. And I think some tattoos and piercings are very sexy. (Does that surprise anyone?)
The women I�m describing have a childlike (not childish) quality, and thus they usually love children and relate to them well. In fact, natural children have most of the qualities I�m describing, too.
The women I�m describing are more concerned about what they�re beginning and what�s possible than about what they�ve done in the past and what isn�t possible. They�re excited about what�s coming.
Similarly these women have an adventurous spirit. No matter what their chronological age, you won�t hear them saying �I can�t� or �What if� or �I�m too old� about anything. They�ll leap into life with gusto. Some of the things I�m looking forward to doing are moving to Santa Fe with no safety net, starting a psychospiritual community from nothing, hiking all the trails in Zion National Park some day, going whitewater rafting with other Warrior Spirit folks in July, and maybe running (jogging and/or walking) a marathon in either Dublin, Ireland, or Honolulu as a fund-raiser for the Arthritis Foundation. These women would have similar adventures in mind, and their response to my ideas would more likely be �sounds like fun� than �I could never do that.�
And further, the women I�m describing are open to and accepting of new experiences, new cultural developments, and a wide variety of activities. Their orientation to new things is �how interesting� and possibly �I�d like to try that.� They tend to never say �never.�
Chronological age isn�t an important factor in what I�m describing in these women. Their spirit is youthful however many years they�ve been on the planet. I admit (much to my chagrin sometimes) that I much more frequently see young women who are like I�m describing than I do older ones. But I also personally know women in their 50s who exemplify the qualities I�m describing. And I recently saw a man in his 80s on TV who is a perfect example of what I�m talking about (except for his gender). I loved the guy (and so did most of the other people on the show). Another example is Maude (played by Ruth Gordon) in �Harold and Maude.� She was 79 (in the film).
So, can you think of a 1 or 2 word description of the kind of woman I�m describing?
Last week I was having lunch with Ginny and talking about this. She made an extremely perceptive observation. Knowing me well, as she does, she pointed out that what I�m describing sounds like the personality of a cheerleader. Those of you who�ve been around awhile know of the issues I�ve had about cheerleaders. Yes, she�s right. I love the best of the cheerleader personality (but not the superficiality, judgmentalness, and in-groupiness that�s the worst of the cheerleader personality � as I perceive it). So, there you have it: part of the issues I�ve had with cheerleaders is because I�ve been attracted to them.
And, of course, I�m well aware of what some of you may be thinking. Whatever we�re especially attracted to is usually a projection of what we either like or else need to develop in ourselves. So, my challenge, if this is the kind of woman I want to be with, is to embody these characteristics myself � to be what I seek. I think I�m actually doing pretty well with it, but, of course, it�s something for me to pay attention to.
Am I one of a small group that finds this kind of thing exceptionally attractive? Or, as it seems like it must be to me, have I been describing something that nearly everyone finds attractive? No, come to think of it, I know that some people find the cool, sophisticated, mysterious type attractive, and that�s pretty much the opposite of what I�m describing. What about you?
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi again, y�all ~
There�s been an issue jumping up and down and waving its arms in my awareness lately. I�ve been trying to describe a characteristic that I find exceptionally attractive in women. It isn�t the only characteristic I find attractive, but it is an important one. It has described most (if not all) of the women I�ve been very attracted to in the past 6 or 8 years. It explains why I�ve lost interest in some of the women I�ve been involved with. It partly explains why I haven�t dated much since Valerie. (I no longer date women who I might have dated in the past who aren�t like this.) When I look back on women in my past who I�m still strongly attracted to (and there are more than a few of them), it describes all of them � at least at the time I knew them it described them. And there�s one woman I knew in 1977 (who I really can�t say I was involved with) who was the operational definition of what I mean. (I mean Wendy, for those of you who know about her.) It describes most (if not all) of the women I�ve mentioned in these letters. It describes what makes so many women in Leap of Faith attractive to me. It explains why I don�t think I could ever fall in love with someone I meet via e-mail until I�ve met her in person. It explains why I can fall in love with characters in movies who don�t even really exist in real life.
As I write about this, I�m beginning to see how important this is to me � even more than I thought before. Wow.
I don�t have the (brief) right words to describe it. If anyone can help me, I�d be grateful. It�s so frustrating for me not to be able to easily communicate what I mean to other people.
Here are some words that capture aspects of what I mean: enthusiastic, vibrant, energetic, expressive, positive, eager, adventurous, and youthful in spirit. Elaborating:
The women I�m describing are self-expressive � physically, facially, emotionally, verbally. That�s why actresses, dancers, and artists are all especially attractive to me. As examples, imagine Liv Ullman, Goldie Hawn, Meryl Streep, Meg Ryan, and Kate Hudson (to use examples from a range of ages). I usually fall in love with women who cry with me � or at least in my presence. The more women put their all into Leap of Faith, the more I find them attractive. I love open self-expression.
The women I�m describing usually have an offbeat, non-traditional quality of some sort (that�s also related to the self-expressiveness). For example, I tend to like women who dress unconventionally. I often like women who think outside the cultural boxes. And I think some tattoos and piercings are very sexy. (Does that surprise anyone?)
The women I�m describing have a childlike (not childish) quality, and thus they usually love children and relate to them well. In fact, natural children have most of the qualities I�m describing, too.
The women I�m describing are more concerned about what they�re beginning and what�s possible than about what they�ve done in the past and what isn�t possible. They�re excited about what�s coming.
Similarly these women have an adventurous spirit. No matter what their chronological age, you won�t hear them saying �I can�t� or �What if� or �I�m too old� about anything. They�ll leap into life with gusto. Some of the things I�m looking forward to doing are moving to Santa Fe with no safety net, starting a psychospiritual community from nothing, hiking all the trails in Zion National Park some day, going whitewater rafting with other Warrior Spirit folks in July, and maybe running (jogging and/or walking) a marathon in either Dublin, Ireland, or Honolulu as a fund-raiser for the Arthritis Foundation. These women would have similar adventures in mind, and their response to my ideas would more likely be �sounds like fun� than �I could never do that.�
And further, the women I�m describing are open to and accepting of new experiences, new cultural developments, and a wide variety of activities. Their orientation to new things is �how interesting� and possibly �I�d like to try that.� They tend to never say �never.�
Chronological age isn�t an important factor in what I�m describing in these women. Their spirit is youthful however many years they�ve been on the planet. I admit (much to my chagrin sometimes) that I much more frequently see young women who are like I�m describing than I do older ones. But I also personally know women in their 50s who exemplify the qualities I�m describing. And I recently saw a man in his 80s on TV who is a perfect example of what I�m talking about (except for his gender). I loved the guy (and so did most of the other people on the show). Another example is Maude (played by Ruth Gordon) in �Harold and Maude.� She was 79 (in the film).
So, can you think of a 1 or 2 word description of the kind of woman I�m describing?
Last week I was having lunch with Ginny and talking about this. She made an extremely perceptive observation. Knowing me well, as she does, she pointed out that what I�m describing sounds like the personality of a cheerleader. Those of you who�ve been around awhile know of the issues I�ve had about cheerleaders. Yes, she�s right. I love the best of the cheerleader personality (but not the superficiality, judgmentalness, and in-groupiness that�s the worst of the cheerleader personality � as I perceive it). So, there you have it: part of the issues I�ve had with cheerleaders is because I�ve been attracted to them.
And, of course, I�m well aware of what some of you may be thinking. Whatever we�re especially attracted to is usually a projection of what we either like or else need to develop in ourselves. So, my challenge, if this is the kind of woman I want to be with, is to embody these characteristics myself � to be what I seek. I think I�m actually doing pretty well with it, but, of course, it�s something for me to pay attention to.
Am I one of a small group that finds this kind of thing exceptionally attractive? Or, as it seems like it must be to me, have I been describing something that nearly everyone finds attractive? No, come to think of it, I know that some people find the cool, sophisticated, mysterious type attractive, and that�s pretty much the opposite of what I�m describing. What about you?
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Tuesday, May 29, 2001
Originally published Wednesday, 5/16/2001
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, all of you amazing beings ~
Okay, I�m going to complete what I started on Sunday. I�m going to talk about my experience of staffing Leap of Faith this past weekend � that and also what it meant to me.
Several things stood out for me this time. If you�ve known me for awhile, or if you�ve been reading these letters for awhile, then you know that Leap of Faith is always a significant event in my life. It was significant when I was a participant, and it has been significant every time that I�ve been on staff. But each time also offers something unique for me. Each time brings its own special gifts. And so it was this time � perhaps this time more than most, in fact.
The Leap staff is one of the 2 most effective, well-oiled teams filled with people who take ownership of their own jobs and the job as a whole that I�ve ever seen. (The other is Vaughan�s earthquake preparedness installation team. Interesting that I�d be involved with both of them now, at the same time in my life. That seems important. I�m sure I�m being told something.) I�ve always seen myself as just one cog in the team, never as anyone particularly noticeable. I wasn�t one of the team leaders. I just did my job as well as I could, like everyone else did.
But this time, for some reason, I began to experience being recognized and appreciated. (I�m sure that�s more about my openness to perceiving it than about anyone else.)
First, Chris (the event producer and Tammi�s partner � the latter having nothing particularly to do with Leap of Faith, but being an identifier for those of you who�ve been keeping up with my life) selected me several times to do special jobs. The one that gave me the most recognition was being the male demonstrator for some of the skills taught in the program. I won�t be more specific than that in order not to reveal anything that might detract from the value of the program for anyone who might take it in the future. (Surprise and facing the unknown are important aspects of the design of Leap of Faith.) Suffice it to say that it gave me the opportunity to be �on stage� and to contribute something very noticeable to the students.
The shift in my experience following that was dramatic. Suddenly I was being recognized and appreciated in a way I never had experienced before in that setting. Staff members gave me positive feedback. Several staff members interacted with me in ways they never had before. One, in particular, a man I respect highly for his skill at doing his job (Tiko, for those of you who know him � the long-haired Botha, for those of you who know him but don�t know his name), really embraced me in ways he hadn't before. (He was my �partner� in one of the demonstrations.) More students than ever before talked with me, and some of them told me how much what I had done had meant to them. Jeff even came to me to tell me he thought I�d done a good job.
This is all just coming together now as I�m writing about it. I�m acknowledging to myself how much I love being noticed and appreciated. (Gosh, I bet that�s a shock to some of you, isn�t it?) It isn�t my motivation for doing the job. I put just as much into my work when I didn�t receive as much recognition. But it certainly is a huge bonus for me.
And I�m noticing how much of a difference being noticed and appreciated made in my feeling like I�m part of the group. As I�ve written openly about before, I have a tendency to feel like I don�t really belong in groups, like I�m something of an outsider. Now I feel much more like I belong.
And, I admit, I noticed that I was feeling much more like I was part of the group even before I did the demos. I�m getting to know people, and I�ve experienced being warmly received by quite a few of them. It seems as if every time I�m on staff, a few more of the other staff members open up to me.
The issue for me is being seen. I mean really seen, not just viewed. I mean being seen as someone important. This is a big issue for me in life. Rev. Joan Gattuso brought it to my attention first about 6 or 7 years ago. (Thank you, Joan.) It goes hand in hand with feeling like I don�t belong. If I�m not seen, how can I feel like I belong? And the shy child in me was great at not being seen. I�ve attempted to overcome that through my life by doing things that put me in positions to be seen. But it�s always been a dynamic tension between wanting to be seen and wanting not to be seen (or thinking I didn�t deserve to be seen, maybe it really was � or maybe it was even more fearing that I�d be humiliated if I were seen).
But something shifted here. I jumped at the chance to be seen, and I ended up feeling like I belonged � at least more so.
Isn�t this fun for you? You�re getting to observe me processing things and arriving at insights.
So, back to Leap of Faith. One of the things I�ve been noticing for awhile now, but especially this time, is that the value of the Leap has been cumulative for me. Over time since I was a participant in the program, I�ve noticed myself increasingly taking appropriate action in situations when I�ve felt anxiety or fear. There are fewer and fewer things that I avoid, and the length of time that I avoid when I do is shorter and shorter. And concurrently (perhaps consequently) I feel increasing self-confidence and increasingly solidly grounded in my truth.
I won�t say that Leap of Faith is solely responsible for those changes, but I will say without hesitation that it has played an important role in them.
And, wouldn�t it be perfect if I had had the opportunity to demonstrate my willingness to walk into my fear during the weekend? Would that have been a surprise to you? Not to me.
Remember the woman I was so attracted to at the last Leap? No, I guess a lot of you haven�t heard about that yet. Briefly catching you up on it, I went through a period of indecision about whether it was in everyone�s best interests for me to tell her about it, given that, for a variety of reasons, I wasn�t wanting to start a relationship with her. Yes, I hear someone asking �Why not?� The 3 biggest reasons, in order of decreasing importance are (1) because I�ve agreed with Warrior Spirit not to get involved with anyone who participated in a Leap I staffed for at least 6 months (it�s similar to a therapist not getting involved with a client), (2) because I�m moving to Santa Fe, and (3) because she�s quite a bit younger than I am (though, come to find out, not as much younger as I thought). Anyway, I finally realized that it was important to me for the sake of my self-expression and walking through my fear (and possibly for her) to tell her. However, I hadn't gotten around to it yet.
Well, guess what. She was there. What a shock, huh? Isn�t that the way Spirit works? If I�m supposed to do something, Spirit provides me the opportunity. In fact, not only was she there, she sat down next to me and started a conversation. Could Spirit have been knocking much more loudly? She was even more attractive to me up close and personal than she was across the room.
So, I told her. I told her that I love her energy, how she expresses herself, and her smile. All of those things fit right in with the �type� of woman I�m especially attracted to that I�ve been trying to describe for a long time and never have done to my satisfaction. More about that in another letter. I had a significant conversation about it with Ginny last Thursday.
I followed that up by starting a conversation with a woman who I refer to as �yoga woman.� I call her that partly because I don�t know her name (people don�t reveal their real names in the Leap, and, though I could have, I didn�t check the list of participants to find it) and partly because what really attracted me to her was her doing yoga. It wasn�t just any yoga. She was doing all of these amazing poses that require incredible balance and flexibility � the kinds of poses I�ve only seen before from experts with many years of experience. I have to acknowledge that I found her very sexy while she was doing them. We ended up talking together several times.
And what I realized is that for me to keep walking through an important doorway, it�s important that I keep initiating conversations with women I find attractive � whether I want anything more than to talk with them or not. Just the act of starting those conversations is stepping into the doorway.
Okay, back to the demos again. When Chris asked me to do them, I didn�t even hesitate. Spirit just spoke through me: �Yes, I�ll do it.� What was even more amazing to me was that I never had a doubt about it. I simply knew I could do it, despite the fact that I hadn't used the skills I was going to demonstrate since I had participated in Leap of Faith nearly 2 years ago. I had seen the demos numerous times, though. I trusted that the cells of my body remembered how to do it. No, it was beyond trust; it was absolute faith. Shortly after I took the Leap, I wrote that I�d never be intimidated again. I knew then that I wouldn�t forget the skills. And I didn�t forget; I did it. I didn�t do them perfectly, but I did them pretty well.
During our closing staff circle on Sunday, Laurie Alexander gave all of us a gift � homemade Buddhist prayer beads with yellow smiley face beads. Significantly, there was exactly the same number of beads in each string as there were staff members in the circle. It means a lot to me, and I take it with me wherever I go. It reminds me of all I�ve received from Warrior Spirit, and it reminds me of the staff � of cooperation, strength, support, contribution, enthusiasm, love, service, and so much more. So, if you see me sometime and see me with a double ring of yellow beads around my wrist or hanging from my rear view mirror, you�ll know what that�s all about. And you can remember, too.
Would you all please send out a prayer or positive thoughts or heart energy or Reiki (whatever you believe in) for Buck Buckles? He�s the technical director for the Leap. He had surgery on Tuesday (another in a series). I�d love to see some medical miracles occur in his life. Thanks.
I know that the people for whom Leap of Faith is appropriate will feel called to it. I urge you to pay attention right now. Do you feel something stirring in you about it? Do you feel even a bit of curiosity? If so, you can get more information at http://www.warriorspirit.org. I�d love to live in a world full of people who are Leap grads.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, all of you amazing beings ~
Okay, I�m going to complete what I started on Sunday. I�m going to talk about my experience of staffing Leap of Faith this past weekend � that and also what it meant to me.
Several things stood out for me this time. If you�ve known me for awhile, or if you�ve been reading these letters for awhile, then you know that Leap of Faith is always a significant event in my life. It was significant when I was a participant, and it has been significant every time that I�ve been on staff. But each time also offers something unique for me. Each time brings its own special gifts. And so it was this time � perhaps this time more than most, in fact.
The Leap staff is one of the 2 most effective, well-oiled teams filled with people who take ownership of their own jobs and the job as a whole that I�ve ever seen. (The other is Vaughan�s earthquake preparedness installation team. Interesting that I�d be involved with both of them now, at the same time in my life. That seems important. I�m sure I�m being told something.) I�ve always seen myself as just one cog in the team, never as anyone particularly noticeable. I wasn�t one of the team leaders. I just did my job as well as I could, like everyone else did.
But this time, for some reason, I began to experience being recognized and appreciated. (I�m sure that�s more about my openness to perceiving it than about anyone else.)
First, Chris (the event producer and Tammi�s partner � the latter having nothing particularly to do with Leap of Faith, but being an identifier for those of you who�ve been keeping up with my life) selected me several times to do special jobs. The one that gave me the most recognition was being the male demonstrator for some of the skills taught in the program. I won�t be more specific than that in order not to reveal anything that might detract from the value of the program for anyone who might take it in the future. (Surprise and facing the unknown are important aspects of the design of Leap of Faith.) Suffice it to say that it gave me the opportunity to be �on stage� and to contribute something very noticeable to the students.
The shift in my experience following that was dramatic. Suddenly I was being recognized and appreciated in a way I never had experienced before in that setting. Staff members gave me positive feedback. Several staff members interacted with me in ways they never had before. One, in particular, a man I respect highly for his skill at doing his job (Tiko, for those of you who know him � the long-haired Botha, for those of you who know him but don�t know his name), really embraced me in ways he hadn't before. (He was my �partner� in one of the demonstrations.) More students than ever before talked with me, and some of them told me how much what I had done had meant to them. Jeff even came to me to tell me he thought I�d done a good job.
This is all just coming together now as I�m writing about it. I�m acknowledging to myself how much I love being noticed and appreciated. (Gosh, I bet that�s a shock to some of you, isn�t it?) It isn�t my motivation for doing the job. I put just as much into my work when I didn�t receive as much recognition. But it certainly is a huge bonus for me.
And I�m noticing how much of a difference being noticed and appreciated made in my feeling like I�m part of the group. As I�ve written openly about before, I have a tendency to feel like I don�t really belong in groups, like I�m something of an outsider. Now I feel much more like I belong.
And, I admit, I noticed that I was feeling much more like I was part of the group even before I did the demos. I�m getting to know people, and I�ve experienced being warmly received by quite a few of them. It seems as if every time I�m on staff, a few more of the other staff members open up to me.
The issue for me is being seen. I mean really seen, not just viewed. I mean being seen as someone important. This is a big issue for me in life. Rev. Joan Gattuso brought it to my attention first about 6 or 7 years ago. (Thank you, Joan.) It goes hand in hand with feeling like I don�t belong. If I�m not seen, how can I feel like I belong? And the shy child in me was great at not being seen. I�ve attempted to overcome that through my life by doing things that put me in positions to be seen. But it�s always been a dynamic tension between wanting to be seen and wanting not to be seen (or thinking I didn�t deserve to be seen, maybe it really was � or maybe it was even more fearing that I�d be humiliated if I were seen).
But something shifted here. I jumped at the chance to be seen, and I ended up feeling like I belonged � at least more so.
Isn�t this fun for you? You�re getting to observe me processing things and arriving at insights.
So, back to Leap of Faith. One of the things I�ve been noticing for awhile now, but especially this time, is that the value of the Leap has been cumulative for me. Over time since I was a participant in the program, I�ve noticed myself increasingly taking appropriate action in situations when I�ve felt anxiety or fear. There are fewer and fewer things that I avoid, and the length of time that I avoid when I do is shorter and shorter. And concurrently (perhaps consequently) I feel increasing self-confidence and increasingly solidly grounded in my truth.
I won�t say that Leap of Faith is solely responsible for those changes, but I will say without hesitation that it has played an important role in them.
And, wouldn�t it be perfect if I had had the opportunity to demonstrate my willingness to walk into my fear during the weekend? Would that have been a surprise to you? Not to me.
Remember the woman I was so attracted to at the last Leap? No, I guess a lot of you haven�t heard about that yet. Briefly catching you up on it, I went through a period of indecision about whether it was in everyone�s best interests for me to tell her about it, given that, for a variety of reasons, I wasn�t wanting to start a relationship with her. Yes, I hear someone asking �Why not?� The 3 biggest reasons, in order of decreasing importance are (1) because I�ve agreed with Warrior Spirit not to get involved with anyone who participated in a Leap I staffed for at least 6 months (it�s similar to a therapist not getting involved with a client), (2) because I�m moving to Santa Fe, and (3) because she�s quite a bit younger than I am (though, come to find out, not as much younger as I thought). Anyway, I finally realized that it was important to me for the sake of my self-expression and walking through my fear (and possibly for her) to tell her. However, I hadn't gotten around to it yet.
Well, guess what. She was there. What a shock, huh? Isn�t that the way Spirit works? If I�m supposed to do something, Spirit provides me the opportunity. In fact, not only was she there, she sat down next to me and started a conversation. Could Spirit have been knocking much more loudly? She was even more attractive to me up close and personal than she was across the room.
So, I told her. I told her that I love her energy, how she expresses herself, and her smile. All of those things fit right in with the �type� of woman I�m especially attracted to that I�ve been trying to describe for a long time and never have done to my satisfaction. More about that in another letter. I had a significant conversation about it with Ginny last Thursday.
I followed that up by starting a conversation with a woman who I refer to as �yoga woman.� I call her that partly because I don�t know her name (people don�t reveal their real names in the Leap, and, though I could have, I didn�t check the list of participants to find it) and partly because what really attracted me to her was her doing yoga. It wasn�t just any yoga. She was doing all of these amazing poses that require incredible balance and flexibility � the kinds of poses I�ve only seen before from experts with many years of experience. I have to acknowledge that I found her very sexy while she was doing them. We ended up talking together several times.
And what I realized is that for me to keep walking through an important doorway, it�s important that I keep initiating conversations with women I find attractive � whether I want anything more than to talk with them or not. Just the act of starting those conversations is stepping into the doorway.
Okay, back to the demos again. When Chris asked me to do them, I didn�t even hesitate. Spirit just spoke through me: �Yes, I�ll do it.� What was even more amazing to me was that I never had a doubt about it. I simply knew I could do it, despite the fact that I hadn't used the skills I was going to demonstrate since I had participated in Leap of Faith nearly 2 years ago. I had seen the demos numerous times, though. I trusted that the cells of my body remembered how to do it. No, it was beyond trust; it was absolute faith. Shortly after I took the Leap, I wrote that I�d never be intimidated again. I knew then that I wouldn�t forget the skills. And I didn�t forget; I did it. I didn�t do them perfectly, but I did them pretty well.
During our closing staff circle on Sunday, Laurie Alexander gave all of us a gift � homemade Buddhist prayer beads with yellow smiley face beads. Significantly, there was exactly the same number of beads in each string as there were staff members in the circle. It means a lot to me, and I take it with me wherever I go. It reminds me of all I�ve received from Warrior Spirit, and it reminds me of the staff � of cooperation, strength, support, contribution, enthusiasm, love, service, and so much more. So, if you see me sometime and see me with a double ring of yellow beads around my wrist or hanging from my rear view mirror, you�ll know what that�s all about. And you can remember, too.
Would you all please send out a prayer or positive thoughts or heart energy or Reiki (whatever you believe in) for Buck Buckles? He�s the technical director for the Leap. He had surgery on Tuesday (another in a series). I�d love to see some medical miracles occur in his life. Thanks.
I know that the people for whom Leap of Faith is appropriate will feel called to it. I urge you to pay attention right now. Do you feel something stirring in you about it? Do you feel even a bit of curiosity? If so, you can get more information at http://www.warriorspirit.org. I�d love to live in a world full of people who are Leap grads.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Originally published Sunday, 5/13/2001
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, all of you magnificent beings ~
Okay, folks, I�ve made a decision about these letters. I�m going to start writing about what�s going on now and also write the updates about past events. That way, sooner or later, I should be back to just the present. And I won�t keep feeling frustrated about thinking I need to wait to talk about now until later because I haven�t written about a couple of months ago yet. So, actually, my letter about joy and Santa Fe was the first under my latest new policy.
I thank Jeff Alexander (facilitator of Leap of Faith, for anyone who doesn�t remember who he is yet) for reminding me that there is no value in consistency for its own sake. I can change my mind whenever Spirit gives me new directions.
Related to that, Jeff tells a story about Mahatma Gandhi. He had announced, publicized, and planned a long march. Thousands of people from all over India came to walk with him. Shortly before the march was to begin, he learned that the British army was planning to react with violence, possibly killing many people. He went into meditation and then announced that he was canceling the march. His associates were stunned. They told him that he couldn�t do that. �Look out the window,� they said. �There are thousands of people who�ve traveled many miles to participate.� He replied, �I always follow my truth, and my truth may change moment by moment.� The march was canceled.
I follow Spirit, no matter how often the directions may change. How do I know that it wasn�t just the first step in the direction of an intention that was the important one? Or maybe the first dozen, or the first 100? Maybe the goal was nothing more than a direction to move in so that I could take those steps, however many of them were important to me. And when I�ve taken the steps that are in my highest interest, I�ll be given new traveling directions, and it will be time to alter my course.
It, of course, occurs to me that I could be talking about far more than just what I write about in these letters. Someone recently suggested that my directions to go to Santa Fe might change, that it might be a temporary destination. Could be. We shall see.
The important thing is that I follow the directions I receive as long as they�re given to me and that I change directions as soon as I�m given the new destination. To some people what I�m saying may sound like the height of lack of commitment. On the contrary; it�s the height of commitment. It�s that I�m committed to Spirit instead of to the destination. To some people, what I�m saying may sound like the height of insecurity. On the contrary; it�s the height of security. My security is in following Spirit without hesitation, not in any given location, goal, or destination.
My friend Bobbie recently demonstrated that very kind of commitment and security. She had been planning to move to Santa Fe later this summer to be part of the Heart Song Community there. We were planning to do some work together. But Spirit gave her a new direction. She reconnected with Bill after 20 years apart and is following her new traveling directions to move to Florida to be with him. Is that disappointing to me? Only to my ego-mind. My Higher Self, my connection with Spirit, rejoices in her willingness to follow her call, wherever it may take her.
Well, I didn�t know that wanted to be written. Whenever I open my mind and heart to Spirit, all kinds of fascinating things come through.
Fascinating. Do you love synchronicity as much as I do? Here I am writing about being called and following Spirit while I�m watching Touched by an Angel. And what just occurred there? A man just spoke about what he was doing not being his calling and how he was leaving to find what he was being called to do. And standing right there, listening, unbeknownst to him, were 2 angels, preparing to give him his new directions. Is that too perfect? I wonder what the message is to me. I believe all synchronicity is a message of some sort from Spirit.
What I meant to write about when I started this letter is the Leap of Faith I just staffed. And so I will.
And again. Touched by an Angel is over and something called Blonde has come on. It�s a fictional drama about Marilyn Monroe taken from a novel by Joyce Carol Oates. I was about ready to turn it off when Norma Jean�s mother began to talk to her about protecting herself from predators (though she didn�t use that term). She was giving her �wonderful� advice like �don�t sit near men� in the movie theater where the mother was sending her alone and �walk on the edge of the sidewalk under the street lights so you�ll be seen if someone grabs you.� And 5 or 6 hours ago, what was Jeff talking about? The children�s program Warrior Spirit has offered to teach kids to protect themselves from predators. What�s the message, Spirit?
I don�t think this is the message, but what�s happened is that I�ve written so long about other things that I�m too sleepy to keep writing. (I didn�t get much sleep the past 3 nights.) Besides, this one is already long enough. So, I�m wrapping it up for tonight.
Tomorrow I�ll tell you the amazing things that happened for me at LoF. It was quite an event for me (and lots of other people, too).
Ah, the suspense is gripping, isn�t it?
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, all of you magnificent beings ~
Okay, folks, I�ve made a decision about these letters. I�m going to start writing about what�s going on now and also write the updates about past events. That way, sooner or later, I should be back to just the present. And I won�t keep feeling frustrated about thinking I need to wait to talk about now until later because I haven�t written about a couple of months ago yet. So, actually, my letter about joy and Santa Fe was the first under my latest new policy.
I thank Jeff Alexander (facilitator of Leap of Faith, for anyone who doesn�t remember who he is yet) for reminding me that there is no value in consistency for its own sake. I can change my mind whenever Spirit gives me new directions.
Related to that, Jeff tells a story about Mahatma Gandhi. He had announced, publicized, and planned a long march. Thousands of people from all over India came to walk with him. Shortly before the march was to begin, he learned that the British army was planning to react with violence, possibly killing many people. He went into meditation and then announced that he was canceling the march. His associates were stunned. They told him that he couldn�t do that. �Look out the window,� they said. �There are thousands of people who�ve traveled many miles to participate.� He replied, �I always follow my truth, and my truth may change moment by moment.� The march was canceled.
I follow Spirit, no matter how often the directions may change. How do I know that it wasn�t just the first step in the direction of an intention that was the important one? Or maybe the first dozen, or the first 100? Maybe the goal was nothing more than a direction to move in so that I could take those steps, however many of them were important to me. And when I�ve taken the steps that are in my highest interest, I�ll be given new traveling directions, and it will be time to alter my course.
It, of course, occurs to me that I could be talking about far more than just what I write about in these letters. Someone recently suggested that my directions to go to Santa Fe might change, that it might be a temporary destination. Could be. We shall see.
The important thing is that I follow the directions I receive as long as they�re given to me and that I change directions as soon as I�m given the new destination. To some people what I�m saying may sound like the height of lack of commitment. On the contrary; it�s the height of commitment. It�s that I�m committed to Spirit instead of to the destination. To some people, what I�m saying may sound like the height of insecurity. On the contrary; it�s the height of security. My security is in following Spirit without hesitation, not in any given location, goal, or destination.
My friend Bobbie recently demonstrated that very kind of commitment and security. She had been planning to move to Santa Fe later this summer to be part of the Heart Song Community there. We were planning to do some work together. But Spirit gave her a new direction. She reconnected with Bill after 20 years apart and is following her new traveling directions to move to Florida to be with him. Is that disappointing to me? Only to my ego-mind. My Higher Self, my connection with Spirit, rejoices in her willingness to follow her call, wherever it may take her.
Well, I didn�t know that wanted to be written. Whenever I open my mind and heart to Spirit, all kinds of fascinating things come through.
Fascinating. Do you love synchronicity as much as I do? Here I am writing about being called and following Spirit while I�m watching Touched by an Angel. And what just occurred there? A man just spoke about what he was doing not being his calling and how he was leaving to find what he was being called to do. And standing right there, listening, unbeknownst to him, were 2 angels, preparing to give him his new directions. Is that too perfect? I wonder what the message is to me. I believe all synchronicity is a message of some sort from Spirit.
What I meant to write about when I started this letter is the Leap of Faith I just staffed. And so I will.
And again. Touched by an Angel is over and something called Blonde has come on. It�s a fictional drama about Marilyn Monroe taken from a novel by Joyce Carol Oates. I was about ready to turn it off when Norma Jean�s mother began to talk to her about protecting herself from predators (though she didn�t use that term). She was giving her �wonderful� advice like �don�t sit near men� in the movie theater where the mother was sending her alone and �walk on the edge of the sidewalk under the street lights so you�ll be seen if someone grabs you.� And 5 or 6 hours ago, what was Jeff talking about? The children�s program Warrior Spirit has offered to teach kids to protect themselves from predators. What�s the message, Spirit?
I don�t think this is the message, but what�s happened is that I�ve written so long about other things that I�m too sleepy to keep writing. (I didn�t get much sleep the past 3 nights.) Besides, this one is already long enough. So, I�m wrapping it up for tonight.
Tomorrow I�ll tell you the amazing things that happened for me at LoF. It was quite an event for me (and lots of other people, too).
Ah, the suspense is gripping, isn�t it?
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Originally published Tuesday, 5/8/2001
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, all ~
Yes, a special edition, an out-of-order, don�t-want-to-wait-with-this letter.
I wrote the following in the context of an online "empowerment group" that I'm participating in. The topic for this week is "joy." I feel moved to share it with you, too. A few of you who�ve been around long enough to have read about this when it was happening may remember.
Reflecting on joy - and more specifically on how and when I've experienced joy - I made a connection between it and my intention.
Making a very long story very short (by my standards, at least - you see, I am both a writer and a self-discloser by nature), 4 years ago I was called to go to the Santa Fe - Taos area. I took a 6-week trip that I describe as more vision quest than vacation. It was quite an amazing journey. On my way back to Washington, I began to receive "spiritual dictation" telling me of my mission and my work. Part of that work is the community I'm participating in developing. And clearly, the voices told me, I am to move to Santa Fe to fulfill the mission I've been given. I've stalled on that move. I must believe that each time I've chosen to wait, it's because I've been being given another piece of the foundation for my work there.
Okay, that's enough background for what I want to say about joy to make sense.
The entire time I was on that trip, I was in joy. The vagaries of events didn't affect that experience. If I got what I wanted, I experienced joy. If I didn't get what I wanted, I experienced joy. If I was alone, I experienced joy. If I was with people, I experienced joy. If I was full of energy, I experienced joy. If I was exhausted, I experienced joy. If I felt safe, I experienced joy. If I felt afraid, I experienced joy. (That, I suppose, is a difficult one for people who want to make fear the enemy rather than embracing it as a loyal ally that's showing us our way. The problem is not fear; the problem is unwillingness to take the action that's in our highest interests while we're feeling fear.) If I felt sadness, I experienced joy. (And I did feel sadness. Both Princess Diana and Mother Teresa died while I was in Santa Fe.) No matter what, I experienced joy.
And what was fascinating to me is how things flowed. I can genuinely say that I was "in the flow."
Money was tight for me. At one point, my inner guide told me to stop at a Native American casino. I didn't want to, but I follow insistent spiritual guidance. So, I stopped. I walked around until I was shown a slot machine to play. Approximately my 5th or 6th quarter I played provided me a pay-off of about $250. (I don't recall the exact amount.) I then knew I was finished there and went on my way.
In Santa Fe I was told to buy a lottery ticket. That one provided a $100 pay-off. Things kept happening, and I never did run out of money.
I knew that a high school classmate of mine lived in Santa Fe and was a jeweler, but I didn't know much more than that. She wasn't in the telephone directory (well, she was, but with her married name that I didn't know). One day I was told to go to the Plaza (center of downtown), so I did - even though I didn't feel like it. (Spirit is my guide - never my feelings.) It turned out that there was an arts fair of some kind in the Plaza. I went to the first booth of a jeweler that I saw and asked if he knew Nancy Nichols (her high school name). He said he wasn't from Santa Fe and directed me to another booth with a couple who were from there. It turned out that the woman partner of the couple was a close friend of Nance's.
In the entire 4 corners area (NM, AZ, UT, CO) I felt tremendous familiarity. I knew I had been there before (but never in this lifetime). One day at a kiva (spiritual ceremonial structure) in the Anasazi ruins at Chaco Canyon, NM, I had a powerful spontaneous past life memory of being a shaman performing ceremonies there in about 1000 A.D. It still gives me shivers remembering it.
Are you getting any of the feeling of it from my description? Are you feeling any of the joy? I'm guessing that if you're empathic, you are.
People keep asking me why I'm going to Santa Fe. They keep trying to give me logical reasons not to. Logic plays no role in my commitment to move there. Why am I going? I'm going because I've been told to go, and I follow Spirit without hesitation. I'm going because I knew joy there day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Some won't understand that, so I end up giving them a lot of logical reasons (which I can also give without struggle). But they aren't the reasons I'm going.
I'm going because that's where Spirit wants me to be. I'm going because I am in joy there. That's enough.
Namaste,
Michael
http://members.delphi.com/ohanamd
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, all ~
Yes, a special edition, an out-of-order, don�t-want-to-wait-with-this letter.
I wrote the following in the context of an online "empowerment group" that I'm participating in. The topic for this week is "joy." I feel moved to share it with you, too. A few of you who�ve been around long enough to have read about this when it was happening may remember.
Reflecting on joy - and more specifically on how and when I've experienced joy - I made a connection between it and my intention.
Making a very long story very short (by my standards, at least - you see, I am both a writer and a self-discloser by nature), 4 years ago I was called to go to the Santa Fe - Taos area. I took a 6-week trip that I describe as more vision quest than vacation. It was quite an amazing journey. On my way back to Washington, I began to receive "spiritual dictation" telling me of my mission and my work. Part of that work is the community I'm participating in developing. And clearly, the voices told me, I am to move to Santa Fe to fulfill the mission I've been given. I've stalled on that move. I must believe that each time I've chosen to wait, it's because I've been being given another piece of the foundation for my work there.
Okay, that's enough background for what I want to say about joy to make sense.
The entire time I was on that trip, I was in joy. The vagaries of events didn't affect that experience. If I got what I wanted, I experienced joy. If I didn't get what I wanted, I experienced joy. If I was alone, I experienced joy. If I was with people, I experienced joy. If I was full of energy, I experienced joy. If I was exhausted, I experienced joy. If I felt safe, I experienced joy. If I felt afraid, I experienced joy. (That, I suppose, is a difficult one for people who want to make fear the enemy rather than embracing it as a loyal ally that's showing us our way. The problem is not fear; the problem is unwillingness to take the action that's in our highest interests while we're feeling fear.) If I felt sadness, I experienced joy. (And I did feel sadness. Both Princess Diana and Mother Teresa died while I was in Santa Fe.) No matter what, I experienced joy.
And what was fascinating to me is how things flowed. I can genuinely say that I was "in the flow."
Money was tight for me. At one point, my inner guide told me to stop at a Native American casino. I didn't want to, but I follow insistent spiritual guidance. So, I stopped. I walked around until I was shown a slot machine to play. Approximately my 5th or 6th quarter I played provided me a pay-off of about $250. (I don't recall the exact amount.) I then knew I was finished there and went on my way.
In Santa Fe I was told to buy a lottery ticket. That one provided a $100 pay-off. Things kept happening, and I never did run out of money.
I knew that a high school classmate of mine lived in Santa Fe and was a jeweler, but I didn't know much more than that. She wasn't in the telephone directory (well, she was, but with her married name that I didn't know). One day I was told to go to the Plaza (center of downtown), so I did - even though I didn't feel like it. (Spirit is my guide - never my feelings.) It turned out that there was an arts fair of some kind in the Plaza. I went to the first booth of a jeweler that I saw and asked if he knew Nancy Nichols (her high school name). He said he wasn't from Santa Fe and directed me to another booth with a couple who were from there. It turned out that the woman partner of the couple was a close friend of Nance's.
In the entire 4 corners area (NM, AZ, UT, CO) I felt tremendous familiarity. I knew I had been there before (but never in this lifetime). One day at a kiva (spiritual ceremonial structure) in the Anasazi ruins at Chaco Canyon, NM, I had a powerful spontaneous past life memory of being a shaman performing ceremonies there in about 1000 A.D. It still gives me shivers remembering it.
Are you getting any of the feeling of it from my description? Are you feeling any of the joy? I'm guessing that if you're empathic, you are.
People keep asking me why I'm going to Santa Fe. They keep trying to give me logical reasons not to. Logic plays no role in my commitment to move there. Why am I going? I'm going because I've been told to go, and I follow Spirit without hesitation. I'm going because I knew joy there day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Some won't understand that, so I end up giving them a lot of logical reasons (which I can also give without struggle). But they aren't the reasons I'm going.
I'm going because that's where Spirit wants me to be. I'm going because I am in joy there. That's enough.
Namaste,
Michael
http://members.delphi.com/ohanamd
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Okay, Blogger fans, I'm going to post some earlier letters from this month to sort of help you get a little more up to date. Actually, the truth is that no matter what, it's sort of like walking into the middle of the movie unless you've known me since birth. I've noticed from personal experience, though, that sooner or later I begin to feel like I understand the context with new people I meet. Hopefully that will happen before too long with you, too.
Namaste,
Michael
Namaste,
Michael
Copyright (c) 2001, Michael Dickerson. All Rights Reserved.
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, you who are reading this ~
I�m blogging now. If that sounds painful, revolting, or vaguely obscene to you, that means you aren�t familiar with the phenomenon of online journalling, or web logging, or blogging, for short. Anyway, I�ve created a blog site, and it�s now another way for you to read my letters. You can find them at http://ohanamd.blogspot.com, if that sounds like it would float your boat.
If you�re interested in creating your own blog, you can get started at http://www.blogger.com. If you�d like, you can publish them on your own web site instead of at BlogSpot (where mine resides for now until my new web site is up).
If, on the other hand, you know all about Blogger and are wondering what in the name of Dana Delany This Is My Life is, then here�s a special welcome to you. I�ve been sending journal/letters out for a long time and am just adding the blog option to the various other ways I spill my innards to anyone who cares enough to read the spillage.
Anyway, more to come soon. Hasta la vista, amigos.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ABOUT THIS IS MY LIFE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This Is My Life is my letters to my family, friends, and whoever
else may be interested about whatever is meaningful to me in
my life. I don't guarantee anything about content or frequency.
The letters will be whatever they turn out to be. If you want
the best option available for keeping up with what�s happening
with me, though, this is it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
COPIES AND FORWARDING
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You�re welcome to freely redistribute This Is My Life (my
letters) if you think someone might be interested in reading it.
Please don�t use any of it for profit, though.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ARCHIVES OF MY LETTERS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you would like to read the archives of my letters and/or
holiday letters and travel reports I've written since 1977, visit
the This Is My Life Delphi Forum at
http://www.delphi.com/ThisIsMyLife.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
MY COMMUNITY
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another excellent way to know what�s going on with me is to join
the Heart Song Community e-mail list. That�s an e-mail
community that provides opportunity for discussing a variety of
topics and sharing about our personal lives. You can get more
information and join at
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongCommunity.
~~~~~~~~~
MY WORK
~~~~~~~~~
If you�re interested in my work, I invite you to take a look at
the Heart Song Schedule. That provides information about the
e-zines, classes, workshops, retreats, ministry, web sites, and
other programs offered by the various people and projects of
Heart Song Projects. HSP is an affiliation of people and
projects tied together by shared psychospiritual foundations
and purposes � to contribute to healing, growth, expansion, and
spiritual awakening and to serve Spirit in all life. You can see
the most recent schedules at either
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongSchedule/messages
or http://igc.topica.com/lists/hsschedule/read.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without
permission.
Hi, you who are reading this ~
I�m blogging now. If that sounds painful, revolting, or vaguely obscene to you, that means you aren�t familiar with the phenomenon of online journalling, or web logging, or blogging, for short. Anyway, I�ve created a blog site, and it�s now another way for you to read my letters. You can find them at http://ohanamd.blogspot.com, if that sounds like it would float your boat.
If you�re interested in creating your own blog, you can get started at http://www.blogger.com. If you�d like, you can publish them on your own web site instead of at BlogSpot (where mine resides for now until my new web site is up).
If, on the other hand, you know all about Blogger and are wondering what in the name of Dana Delany This Is My Life is, then here�s a special welcome to you. I�ve been sending journal/letters out for a long time and am just adding the blog option to the various other ways I spill my innards to anyone who cares enough to read the spillage.
Anyway, more to come soon. Hasta la vista, amigos.
Namaste,
Michael
[If you don�t already and would like to receive my letters
directly via e-mail, send an e-mail (no message needed) to either
ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or ThisIsMyLife-subscribe@igc.topica.com.]
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ABOUT THIS IS MY LIFE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This Is My Life is my letters to my family, friends, and whoever
else may be interested about whatever is meaningful to me in
my life. I don't guarantee anything about content or frequency.
The letters will be whatever they turn out to be. If you want
the best option available for keeping up with what�s happening
with me, though, this is it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
COPIES AND FORWARDING
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You�re welcome to freely redistribute This Is My Life (my
letters) if you think someone might be interested in reading it.
Please don�t use any of it for profit, though.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ARCHIVES OF MY LETTERS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you would like to read the archives of my letters and/or
holiday letters and travel reports I've written since 1977, visit
the This Is My Life Delphi Forum at
http://www.delphi.com/ThisIsMyLife.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
MY COMMUNITY
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another excellent way to know what�s going on with me is to join
the Heart Song Community e-mail list. That�s an e-mail
community that provides opportunity for discussing a variety of
topics and sharing about our personal lives. You can get more
information and join at
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongCommunity.
~~~~~~~~~
MY WORK
~~~~~~~~~
If you�re interested in my work, I invite you to take a look at
the Heart Song Schedule. That provides information about the
e-zines, classes, workshops, retreats, ministry, web sites, and
other programs offered by the various people and projects of
Heart Song Projects. HSP is an affiliation of people and
projects tied together by shared psychospiritual foundations
and purposes � to contribute to healing, growth, expansion, and
spiritual awakening and to serve Spirit in all life. You can see
the most recent schedules at either
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartSongSchedule/messages
or http://igc.topica.com/lists/hsschedule/read.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
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