THIS IS MY LIFE
Monday, 4/2/2002
Copyright (c) 2002, Michael (Dickerson) Deluno. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction or quotation is strictly prohibited without permission.

Hi, friends, family, and countrymen (those are guys who live out in the country) ~

Okay, so here�s the story about this job I have and how it relates to money.

I told you how I got it. For anyone who didn�t read that letter, I basically �happened to walk into it.� I was talking with Brendalyn Batchelor, the minister at Unity Santa Fe about other things and mentioned that I was looking for some kind of part time or temporary work. It just so �happened� that she was looking for someone to work temporarily in the office at USF while they prepared to hire someone permanently.

So our needs meshed, and I took the job for a couple of weeks.

What I�ve noticed is that some people like the way I approach jobs and others don�t. I walk in and start looking for how the work could be done more efficiently and effectively. I start reorganizing what needs to be organized differently. I do my best to do everything as well as I can, which sometimes means doing it differently than it�s been done before. In other words, I walk in and own the job. I don�t do well with people telling me to do something one way when I see a better way to do it.

That, in fact, was one of the things that led to my burn-out with the job that I left in 1997. It wasn�t my immediate supervisor who didn�t like my doing that, but the guy the next step up. He kept telling me to stop doing it my way and to start doing it someone else�s. In my opinion, I was being told to do inferior work. I got out of that job very quickly after that.

I don�t always think I know a better way to do things. Sometimes I do. I'm always open to being convinced that another way is more effective and efficient. But I won�t do things some way that I'm not convinced is the best possible way I could do it. That makes me, in some people�s eyes, a difficult employee (one of the characteristics of an Indigo, by the way).

For better or worse, both Kismine (the office manager) and Brendalyn like it that I'm owning the job and making suggestions for changes. I�d only been there a couple of days when Kiz started talking about wanting me to take the job permanently. Of course, it didn�t hurt that I do quality work. And Brendalyn has been thanking me nearly every day for my work.

This, however, brings me to a good news/bad news conundrum.

Good news: If I have to take a job that isn�t really my life�s work, I can�t think of one that would work much better for me. (I know of a relatively new doctor who�s working at a pizza place for money until his practice takes off.) I'm working in a Unity church, a place that is very compatible with my beliefs and values. I'm working with people I like. I'm doing something that contributes to people and to their spiritual awakening (though less directly than I�d prefer).

Bad news: It�s interfering with my getting on with my real life�s work.

Good news: It�s giving me a bank of good will and recognized contribution and quality of work.

Bad news: It may be shaping people�s opinion of me as something other than what I want to be perceived as.

Good news: I'm making money.

Bad news: It�s a lot less than I think I'm worth.

Good news: I have a regular, predictable income for the first time in a very long time.

Bad news: A regular, predictable income can be quite addictive, I'm learning very quickly. It�s making me less inclined to do what I need to do to get my real work going.

Good news: I'll soon be out of my financial crisis.

Bad news: I still won�t be able to afford some of the things I need for my health, and given the amount of money I'm making, I would never be out of debt if that�s all I ever made.

Good news: If I take a �permanent� job, I'll get health insurance.

Bad news: I don�t think I'll get dental insurance.

Good news: I feel pleased that I have a job that I'm doing well and making a difference in.

Bad news: I feel disappointed that I'm working so below my potential.

I�ve known from the beginning that Kiz wants me to keep working there. I wasn�t clear about Brendalyn, though � until today, that is. I told her that I'm preparing a proposal that would keep me there full time until June, then I�d go to Seattle for a couple of weeks (for Leap of Faith and to get more of my stuff that�s stored there), and then I�d come back and work half time after that. She said that she�d support that and that I could even take the whole month of June off if I�d come back. That seemed pretty clear.

So, that�s where I stand with it for the moment. I'll work half time for security and put the rest of my time into developing my real work. I'll also contribute to developing volunteer help to cover the other half time, which will save the church some money, and I'll ask for my own areas of responsibility so that I can really take ownership over some aspects of the work.

Tomorrow I'm going to the �Working with the Media� workshop, and PR seems to be one of the areas I could take as mine. I�ve also listed a number of others. Bookkeeping and finances definitely isn�t among them. Kiz likes doing the bulletins and flyers, or else I�d take that on.

We shall see.

Now my intention is to create income from my real life�s work so that I can eventually release this job to someone else.

Namaste,
Michael

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